Who knows anymore....

I almost wish that you could just start over fresh sometime.
Like you just have a restart button and you can re due everything you did in a situation.
I know I would use that button often...
High school is pretty unforgiving and its hard to change because the typical high school student doesn't allow you to see yourself differently because the past is constantly thrown in your face.
I always catch myself looking back on past experiences and wishing life was still that easy..
Then I realize that when I was in those situations..
I thought i would never get out alive.
I think In the last year I've grown so much..
But I feel bad that I lost friends in the process.
Everyone I talked to a year ago... Ive completely fallen out of contact with.
Some.. Its a good thing but most its not..
Is it right that high school makes you give up friends in order to keep your head above water?
I feel bad because I so badly want to have the same friendships and relationships I once had but I realize that Im not the same girl I once was.
The people i associate with now are those that I need to be around.
I learn from them and hopefully they learn from me.
I get angry sometimes because I feel like others have changed is not so good ways and I want more than anything to have all of my old friends back.
But I know now that we wouldn't be able to get along the same way.
Teenage years are so confusing:( haha